Automatic Tiffanatic | I Looked Into Your Eyes | If Emma Were Slytherin | Robolicious | Tay-Tay | Whitney Avalon

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If Emma Were Slytherin, I’d beg her come hitherin.
Then we will begin… To make out.
Ssssssss [snake sound effect]… Mmmmmm… Ssssssss….Oh!
For sure that would catch my eye, but better she is Cobra Kai.
Then Emma would never die. Forever love. No goodbyes.
Ssssssss. Mmmmm. Ssssssss. Oh!

That's all I got. I'm no lyricist and I'm cursed with not being able to bring anything I start into completion.



* Used ‘Emma’ instead as ‘Hermione’ is obviously underage
* There are grammatical errors but it don’t don’t matter none, so back away now, you spelling-bee nazzies or I will cast a nasty level 50 spell on you!
* I was listening to Chase & Status' “No Problem”, and I received a Pinterest spam wih a photo of Slytherin Hermione and the above verse appeared in my head. Who ever created that picture, thank you!



Enough lyrics for a song now but I'm not going to do the obvious & just lay breaks over famous Harry Potter riffs. Real wizards start from scratch. We need a wizard emoji better than this one


When life hands you lemons You summon demons Hell's bells & witches' spells ♱ Inverted crosses, rebels yell 🜔 Mark a circle & throw salt behind Now cast a hex to control her mind

In the witchin' hour I lose my power. I lose my senses watchin' you
Milk turns to sour when I pick your flower. Have a taste of my witch's brew ...

Now, let me hug you my dear & sing you this song. Place a spell inside your mind & tell your heart where it belongs...

Bubble bubble toil & trouble
Blast that sub & shake that rubble
Drop that bass & make it wobble
The life of a dj is truly noble

Play it again Sam! That...Lucky...Bastard Gaston Got to work with Watson Beast has mustard up nose Lost his shit over a rose
Sitting down at a feast. Must not anger that beast. Sipping red wine decanted. Made this castle enchanted.
Talking plates & spoons. And a man in the moon. Just keep drinking that goon. This is such a silly tune!

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https://youtu.be/la4NIOd2Wh4 [Reputation Tour Dancer Fired Over Sexist Instagram Stories]
Position for a new dancer then? Why have dancers in the first place, Ken?
Just set up some inflatable minions. 
More entertaining. Minions by the millions!

Everyone's eyes are fixated on Tay.
 Well, that's what I think, anyway.

Tay-Tay, makes my day-day. Hope she stays-stay, when I invite her in
No way-way, I'm not gay-gay. Will you play-play? Now let's begin
And this...Is. What. I’d say...
“Hi Tay, how was your day? Come right in I hope you’re ready to play.
If you get real tired you’re quite welcome to stay.” Every night & day, to God I’ve prayed, to bring Taylor Swift my way, hey-hey!

[Need a verse here where I get rejected by Taylor ]
[two more lines here]
Well hey-hey, though meant for Tay-Tay, could also sway-sway for Jessie J.
[Mayday
Payday
Fae (fairy)
Tray
Cray-cray (crazy)]


Girl Like You - Maroon 5 playing on the radio: I need a girl like you. Say that you like me too. Oh yeah, please say, ‘I do’. When I come for you. I’ve been sad my whole life. Help me deal with this strife. Would you be my wife? Say you’ll be my wife
Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah yeah yeah. I need a girl like you, yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah yeah yeah. I need a girl like you, yeah yeah

Then we’ll go dancing with our hands tied, hands tied. Till our hearts melt, and our feet fry, feet fried.

https://youtu.be/rzEpidwMnEs
Told ya, this parteh, would be no fun. If you see them spiders you make sure to run. And boy, did you manage to bring a gun? No? Raise the alarm: Agenda 21 has begun!

News broadcast: Giant mechanical spiders have appeared to cull the general population. If you happen to encounter then make sure to run in the opposite direction. You can not defeat them on your own. Stay tuned to this channel for further alerts. Stay safe. 

Getaway Car
Perfect song for that scene in Thelma & Louise, 'cept it's me & Tay
Dodging bullets & being chased by mech spiders all day
Secret agents fighting against Agenda 21. Getaway vehicle driving towards the sun.
"Lock the gas pedal down baby, set our guns to stun!"
It's a cliffhanger! *boom-tish*

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Uplifting modern jazz number with Orange Samples Passion Flute playing the main melody.

https://youtu.be/PtHdmFSiF08

If anyone knows any similar well-mastered tracks I can A-B against please tell me because I don't really listen to this genre of music.

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The music in my head for this one is a modern take on bluegrass with a Celtic tip like that dancing scene on the Titanic. It has to get people up & dancing. This song is dedicated to Tiffany Alvord.

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Yeah I know I'm such a weird mofo aren't I? In part I blame Whitney for some of my sillyness as I've watched a ton of her Princess rap battle parodies. She in turn takes inspiration from the likes of "Weird Al" Yankovic. So you're in good company then, ahahah.

I'd drop my pantalon for Whitney Avalon. Go Raj! Go Raj! Go Raj! Go Raj! https://vimeo.com/28370331 She's a muffin!

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https://youtu.be/WsTeSx7U7nE

This has been a WIP for more than a decade. It needs vocals.

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Pop goes the weasel. The weasel goes pop. Fill your legs with diesel & bop till you drop. Don't stop, don't stop. Don't stop, don't stop.

She makes me rowdy, really-really rowdy. She makes me rowdy, really-really rowdy. I'm on my knees cause I'm really-really naughty. (I'm on my knees cause I'm really-really naughty.) She makes me rowdy, really-really rowdy. (She makes me rowdy, really-really rowdy.)

XOXO

You can learn a lot of things from a plant.

I feel like gay is a spectrum. Everyone is gay. There is no such thing as gender.

🦝 Regarding her plant: That's GM basil. It looks like sweet basilico but is actually Mary Jane. You should plant some wormwood. It has pleasant foliage and is quite hardy. Then go buy a bottle of Pernod because the bottle looks nice.

🦝 Mr. Skeleton is underfed so is trolling the plant.

☠︎ Oh yeah, I'm not the only one who is underfed!

All I get are crumbs!

Some day I will be Queen. Of. The. World! One Queen. One religion. One currency...

poppy juice.

Metal is a spectrum. Everyone is metal. There is no such thing as genre.

☠︎ Well it's time to get loose now I've had my dose of poppy juice.

Mr. Skeleton, Achmed said he forgives you for being a bully. Sometimes he deserved it. Sometimes he didn't. Can we get past it already, he asks?

...

Deckard: Remember the spider that lived outside your window? Orange body, green legs. Watched her build a 🕸 all summer, then one day there's a big egg in it. The egg hatched...

The egg hatched...

Deckard : Yeah...

...and a hundred baby spiders came out...I collected them, sauted them in garlic & salt, and had a feast.

Deckard : You're a BEAST!

Anti-Poppy Tribunal: Go to HELL! Do not pass GO! Do not collect $200...

Don't worry poppy. I'll be your savior. I'll trawl the depths of hell & drag you back to limbo where we can spend eternity...buckling those sexy long boots of yours.

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Sexy smooth, I luv the way you move. Got nothing else to prove. This eternal groove. Belongs. To. You
She’s eclectic, she’s eclectic, she’s eclectic. So bombastic, so bombastic, so bombastic
She’s electric, she’s electric, she’s electric. Transhumanic, part robotic, not so plastic

Hello, Petal in blue. Show the metal in you. Oowee, take a look at those nails. Now turn around & shake that tail. Dytto’s so pretty in pink, don’t cha think? Dytto reigns supreme, she's my Barbie dream
How can I entice her into my team? She used to be a gymnast, a jumping bean

Yup, Dytto is dope. Unlike the Pope. She gives us hope at the end of the rope
So we elope, to watch Dytto dance. Her robot moves put us in a trance...trance...trance
Her moves are mysterious. The dancing so vicious. I'm not being fictitious. Dytto is robolicious

She’s eclectic, she’s eclectic, she’s eclectic. So bombastic, so bombastic, so bombastic
She’s electric, she’s electric, she’s electric. Transhumanic, part robotic, not so plastic

Sexy smooth, I luv the way you move. Got nothing else to prove. This eternal groove belongs. To. You. My love. Come on Barbie, come to my party...

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https://youtu.be/DIPr1nd8Mrw

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I liked to get down with that teacup pig
Then Ari stole my breath & my goddamn wig

If you've seen the music video to God Is A Woman, there are some beavers screaming. Wanna know why they are screaming? After tunnelling for 500 Miles, they realised they just missed Burning Man. Nothin' now but dust & dessert. And they are thirsty as hell.

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Mister Elliot - You Better. I set out to do a Missy Elliot parody but this is what came to.

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