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It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

If it's not about music it belongs here! Please keep it civil and decent.... except - see below->

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KVRAF
 
2176 posts since 18 Oct, 2010, from Texas
 

Postby ntom; Sat Apr 19, 2014 1:22 am It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

f*ck did I ever think I would be posting this to KVR. This is far from the best place to post this, but I neither blog nor use any other public forum that is easily accessible by many. I found KVR through a google search back in 2010, I'm hoping that years down the line someone researching eHarmony will find this post years down the line to steer them clear.

First off; yeah I admit I'm a bit embaressed to say I resorted to online dating. I don't really want to give the reasons why because that's a long story and this will already be a lengthy rant. So sit back, grab a mug and prepare for that.

As mentioned, I need to rant before I can go to bed.
eHarmony is perhaps the WORST online dating service - scratch that, WORST online service of any well established commercial service available.
I was unfortunately reeled in by their very carefully crafted marketing. I'll give them that; good marketing.
But christ, beyond that it's been nothing but shit aside from one good thing about the service I suppose I should get out of the way now before I rant about all of the shit (and there is a lot).
For the PAID MEMBERS - yeah I paid for this shit - there is a feature called the "book of you" which using all the pre-sign-up questions, they essentially run a psych exam on you and the book of you is a rather interesting break down of your personality. It's fun to read, maybe help you see some flaws in yourself that you can fix.

But let's move on.
Let's start with the main part of the site: the matches.
They are aweful. I did a bit of brief research on eHarmony before deciding to pick them as I don't exactly have a lot of cash to spare to sign up to multiple dating sites. I read an article from apparently one of the employees of eHarmony that mentioned the matching process.
There are 2 parts: The daily matches which are hand selected and then the "What If" matches which are generated based on matching interests, personality, locations, and blah blah blah.
Let's ignore the "What If"s and talk about the core part of these matches.
So, hand picked they say? Then why, oh why, is it that 60% of them say on their profiles under the "last login date" was "Over a month ago"??? Why do you match me with people who aren't active? I get it, people have lives to attend to and can't check their profile every day, but seriously, if they haven't been active in over a month, I think they are long gone from eHarmony.
"So what about the other 40%?" you ask. Why, my good friend, let me tell you.
let's get this clear right now: about 5% are possible matches. Usually this means 1 or less a day. Less? Yes. Because they believe that presenting someone too many options makes people picky. While I agree with this, please don't be stingy with the matches, almighty eHarmony Cupid God. For the love of christ, 4 matches a day is just pitiful. 7 matches is pitiful! Why do I feel "blessed" just to get 10 matches in a day? I'm lucky if I get 10 or more.
So the last 35% typically fall in one of these categories:
1) Lives too far away.
--Look, I get it, there is an option in the settings you can specify the distance it finds matches for you. But seriously? I'm getting matches WAY WAY out of state, is this a joke? when I said "Somewhat Important" I didn't think you would take it as "I don't give a damn where they live".
2) No profile picture.
--God are you serious. I'm paying for this. When in the intro questions you ask me how important looks are, and I gave my answer; THIS is the result you return to me? The numerous matches that come up this way is outstanding. First of all, I don't get what the person is thinking in the first place without a profile picture. Secondly there is a "photo nudge" option on the profile for those that don't have pictures. I was told to use this, and I did - frequently. And more often than not the request was ignored. Great.
3) Free profiles.
--"I'm just using the free version so here's my Skype name and my Facebook, and my - " stop. First of all, you are crazy for releasing all that information on the internet like that. I've even seen a couple include their phone numbers! But whatever, if that's what they want to do fine. But what exactly do free profiles get? Well to be on the site and that's it. They can't use the messaging system at all, and as far as I am aware, they can't even read messages sent to them.
So when I am matched with these profile, when I am PAYING for an account, it just winds up being yet another match that gets dumped in the bin of poorly matched people right away. Thanks eHarmony for really supporting you paying customers.
4) The Uggos.
--Look, I'd be lying if I said I can accept a woman of any body type and build. The fact is, I like a woman that looks good, but I also know where I stand. When I see a woman I can tell if she's out of my league or right in league with me. I'm not looking for a 10/10 or even an 8/10 - I wouldn't might one, but that's not what I am actively seeking. But seriously, if your service is about providing matches without compromising, the very reason why one of your questions was about my concerns on my significant other's looks, then why do you ignore this? I put my answer and it is clearly ignore. I know looks is a subjective thing, so maybe this isn't a valid category to complain about in the matches department of eHarmony, but there have been some really disgusting matches.

With my concerns on the numerous matches that were just going straight to the bin, I finally was concerned about how exactly I had spent my money for this service and contacted customer service. Congradulations on having a fast response. The response was very generic and not very helpful, essentially the eHarmony rendition of standard IT question protocol, "Have you tried turning it off and back on?" So I let this first email slip by, but it was the second email I had gotten back that was written nearly exactly the same, and the third to follow.
I fear there is a growing threat of a clone army of Customer Service Support representatives out there....
Each email was signed by a different representative but each had a very, very similar email, and never, EVER was helpful at all. Telling me generic things I already knew; i.e. when I brought up the matches that had been absent from the website for over a month I mentioned the very same I said above, "I know people have lives they attend to and can be on standby next to their profile 24/7...blahblahblah" and the Customer service rep tried assuring me....what's that? That they might have life to attend to. REALLY? THEY MIGHT? WOW I WISH I HAD THOUGHT OF THAT - oh wait, I SAID THAT IN MY DAMN EMAIL YOU JACKOFF!
And may I remind you this wasn't a one time instance either. God, EA may shit on all of their products they release, but I have not had one bad experience with their customer service and they were rated worse company of the year for 2 years straight!

And finally the real kicker: Money. Money, money, money, money.
They clearly are preying on the desperate. I get it now; this isn't them doing a service for the people. No, they way they see it is that they just need to rake the lonely in with promises of companionship as long as they got the cash "can't put a price on love," comes to mind, "So fork your wallet over so daddy can make some sweet love".
So I'm broke; I established that. I signed up for a 3 month subscription. I know finding a good match might take some time, but I figured 3 months would cover me until either I was making a more steady income or until I found a match.
It was a one time payment of $20 maybe $24 - somewhere around there.
So then, I later get informed from eHarmony billing that "this was the first part of your subscription, complete the rest of your subscription for $24 more!" - okay, I had actually had a rought night of...well no sleep when I signed up, so I thought maybe I did some defered payment thing or something. Whatever. It Autodrafted (shady....) from my account without consent but I thought maybe I had just told it to.
I guess I forgot to read the FINE PRINT where they would actually automatically upgrade me to a 1 year subscription after a month of service, gadammit. I didn't realize this until I was looking over my bankstatement and there it was "EHARMONY 1 YEAR SUB"....ffs.....
FINE, I already hate their customer service, I am certain getting a refund is nothing short of a nightmare, take the damn cash and leave me alone. "NO" eHarmony SHOUTS LOUDLY at me, "EXTEND YOUR SUBSCRIPTION NOW!" every....BLASTED TIME....I LOG IN. This site berates me to extend my 1 year subscription, EVEN LONGER.
Then today, I just noticed, oh there is a tick box for message tracking for when or if your match reads you message. Nifty, wish that was checked by default, but let me check that. *clicks send message* then a pop up; "WE WILL DRAFT YOUR CARD [last 4 of card] FOR $1 FOR USING MESSAGE TRACKING"
FUHCK! ARE YOU KIDDING? You mean a FREE "service" every f**king website, including this VERY forum I am using to type this rant includes. I never even considered it a SERVICE. I always thought of it as a feature until eHarmony sweeps in with it's hands raised for my money showing me the goddamn errors of by beliefs. No No No, says eHarmony, message tracking a kindly service we provide. If you really want love, you got to work for it, remember? Can't place a GADDAMNPRICEONLOVE.
There are charges for "verifying" you identity, there are charges for premium subscriptions, and advanced subscriptions and autodrafts all over the place.
This isn't just a poor business. It's shady, and crafty and lures the desperate and lonely in to prey on their current weakness in life. It's gross. It's manipulative. This is disgusting and just plain outrageous and I swear I want this word to be plastered on the internet for those to read and know this company is nothing short of deceitful and is of the lowest grade company possible.

For the love of all that is holy, do not, DO NOT support this company. Tell your friends, your family, or even just spread the word across you Tweeters and MyBooks to just get this word across that this company is despicable.
I'm glad to know I'm locked into this for a year now, and unfortunately feel so uncomfortable with they way they seem to willingly autodraft that I feel I need to cancel my card. I feel like canceling my membership would not be enough because I am certain they have a termination fee hidden somewhere and I'll be my life it's in the tiniest fine print.
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KVRAF
 
2764 posts since 13 Jan, 2005, from Deutschland

Postby murnau; Sat Apr 19, 2014 1:53 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

it's always the same.. ..this people are criminals in my eyes. nothing else.

ps. it's always a good idea to check google first (i know they are false good reviews i concentrate on the bad ones and see if i can work it out) BEFORE i sign and pay something.
“Our virtues and our failings are inseparable, like force and matter. When they separate, man is no more” ― Nikola Tesla
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KVRian
 
785 posts since 10 Jan, 2006, from Pittsburgh
 

Postby DocAtlas; Sat Apr 19, 2014 3:04 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Wow. I had a very good experience with EHarmony, but that was about seven or eight years ago. It sounds like they've undergone some big changes since then.

I have to admit, I didn't meet my wife through their service, but I did learn a lot about relationships, and I think it helped me in choosing the right person.

I guess a lot of times, a business or service that starts out good devolves into the morass of wasted time and money you experienced. This sucks.
I wish I could sing as well as the voices inside my head...

http://www.cdbaby.com/darkvictory
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KVRian
 
724 posts since 6 Jul, 2008, from Lost in the wilderness
 

Postby Axis1~SL61; Sat Apr 19, 2014 3:32 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Here's one of the most popular forums of the so called "manosphere" where you could post your rant and more effectively denounce their dishonest marketing and probably even help to ruin their business -- it's not a dating site, it's a site to discuss dating techniques (and one can learn a thing or two there, I was impressed!). I would post that rant in their forum , I'm sure they have subforums discussing online dating there, I've seen it but I've not been back there for almost a year. Anyway, you could just copy your text from above and paste it in a new thread in the newcomers section of their forum, or something like that -- take a look :
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index.php
Good Luck! :wink:
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Beware the Quoth
 
21173 posts since 3 Sep, 2001, from R'lyeh Oceanic Amusement Park and Funfair

Postby whyterabbyt; Sat Apr 19, 2014 4:57 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

TLDR version : shallow guy fails to impress women; rants on internet.
To laymen, software development is something akin to wizardry. Neither time, nor effort are involved. If software is missing features they want, or has bugs, it is solely because someone has been too lazy to wave their magic wand.
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KVRian
 
790 posts since 9 Apr, 2011
 

Postby nineofkings; Sat Apr 19, 2014 5:04 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Actual TLDR version: possibly-shallow guy falls victim to manipulative and predatory online billing tactics; rants on internet.
18 year-old "musician."
Land of the free albums: http://nineofkings.bandcamp.com
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Beware the Quoth
 
21173 posts since 3 Sep, 2001, from R'lyeh Oceanic Amusement Park and Funfair

Postby whyterabbyt; Sat Apr 19, 2014 5:10 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

nineofkings wrote:Actual TLDR version: possibly-shallow guy falls victim to manipulative and predatory online billing tactics; rants on internet.


Erm, not quite. It takes 3 seconds to find this:

Prior to purchasing an eHarmony subscription, all members are presented with our auto-renew policy to help clarify the renewal process.


http://help-singles.eharmony.com.au/app ... l/a_id/560

It doesnt take much more to find information on cancellations and refunds.
To laymen, software development is something akin to wizardry. Neither time, nor effort are involved. If software is missing features they want, or has bugs, it is solely because someone has been too lazy to wave their magic wand.
KVRAF
 
5233 posts since 23 May, 2002, from Tutukaka, New Zealand

Postby kritikon; Sat Apr 19, 2014 7:10 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

I would have thought the name would put people off anyway. I see eHarmony and I just assume they're an online version of the Harmony shops. i.e. online dildoes and porn vids. Really, it's not the best name for a dating site. Or maybe it is... :hihi:
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KVRist
 
368 posts since 19 Nov, 2013, from Abandoned Spaceship
 

Postby Blue-eyed Blonde Ape; Sat Apr 19, 2014 8:06 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Failed to impress women on dating sites?
Advice for any man, go ask out some walmart cashier, you'll better off that way, don't try to "impress women" on dating sites.

General rule of thumb, better go date a hooker if you feel like dating site is the only option you have :party:
Soundbanks for Sylenth1, Massive, lush-101, Zebra2, Diva, Monark, DCAM Here and Here
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KVRAF
 
8850 posts since 12 Mar, 2012, from South Bavaria - near the alps... :-)

Postby Tricky-Loops; Sat Apr 19, 2014 8:10 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Please don't tell the poor guy that most dating services are about making money...
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KVRAF
 
8222 posts since 9 Jan, 2004, from leroyaumeuni

Postby spaceman; Sat Apr 19, 2014 8:32 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Sounds like jerking off is the way to go for you.
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KVRAF
 
3990 posts since 6 Aug, 2003, from San Francisco Bay Area

Postby deastman; Sat Apr 19, 2014 9:04 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Ntom, I'm sorry that you were lured in by a shady dating site and wasted your money. In general, I think you'd have better luck meeting people out in the real world. Sign up for art classes at your local community college, join the Sierra Club, volunteer at the food bank, stuff like that. It isn't all about matching a matrix of personality traits. Just find someone you can talk to and enjoy each other's company.
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KVRAF
 
2920 posts since 18 Jul, 2005

Postby robenestobenz; Sat Apr 19, 2014 9:29 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Harsh crowd. I've actually met quite a lot of people that have got together, to one extent or another, using dating sites, Tindr or whatever. Most of them normal and reasonably attractive... the stigma in here seems a bit out of date.

It just sounds like a shit site to me, there must be better options.

Deastman's got good advice. I'd guess that most relationships start through a common environment. It forces you to interact with new people in a steadier and more natural kind of way.
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KVRian
 
1314 posts since 14 Mar, 2013, from Germany

Postby CableChannel; Sat Apr 19, 2014 9:48 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

It's the same that you can experience with lots of companies, mobile phone, DSL or TV suppliers come to mind first. Commercials advertising free service or some very attractive price in font size 150, at the bottom of the page the real deal in font size 4. Namely 24 months contract, much higher price after the 3 months intro period. I get mailings of this kind all the time. That capitalism is a bitch. Blatant customer delusion.
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KVRist
 
368 posts since 19 Nov, 2013, from Abandoned Spaceship
 

Postby Blue-eyed Blonde Ape; Sat Apr 19, 2014 9:55 am Re: It has to be said - a horrible company: eHarmony

Dating sites in general are jerk offs and sluts conglomerate.
That's not true there are some good women.........
Your gray mouse is a long standing dating sites slut, Ever wondered what it would be like if you would go on a dating site and you would get a bunch of attention and you'd able practically to get laid with almost any woman?
Enter women on dating sites.
That's your true thing behind grey mouse's facade.
Some even hide how long they are were, others periodically create new accounts, besides having a bunch of accounts on numerous sites.
Advice to ask out a cashier was based on a thing that she works she doesn't sit hours in front of computer and engage in conversations with numerous freaks.

For average Joe it doesn't look like that, neither photos nor conversations reveals anything twisted about his chosen "normal" grey mouse, she's an OK woman.
But she's not.
Where's only one window of "opportunity" to "catch" a "normal" woman, but I won't gonna say it to protect the "innocent".
good luck freaking out on dating sites and regarding jerking off, average Joe, if he's a descent man, is way better off jerking off than having "conversations" with those amoral miserable twisted empty freaks, which you call "ladies", men are the same there.
There are an average Joe, who's is seriously seeking something and there are those who seriously screwing his grey mouse conversations "lady", during one month of such conversations she ends up crewed by one, two guys, while average Joe tries to persuade her to meet with him, during all that time he wouldn't in a life time even suspect that she screwed already two guys while he's trying to meet with her.

It's just a pathetic circus, tear down down all the tents and you'll see them all in their glory.

Dating sites are candy shops for women, they're living there almost every man's dream. There are no shy, there no grey mouses, there no virgins there, only pathetic freaks spending hours while choosing their next f**(k buddy and that's true for most of them.

You would surprise with what kind of photos some of those freaks sit, enough to say that average Joe has no chance in telling them apart from freaks, no chance, so while she screws someone he's just a conversations pal for her until she gets bored.

So you can go ask out walmart cashier or you can run a risk and try to guess if you're speaking with a slut or not a slut on dating site, unless one is a slut himself, haha

that's was an introduction for "normal" ones, because dating sites in the first place are "find a f***k buddy" place, so all that freaky stuff is normal and expected there, because they all come there for it, so average Joe shouldn't raise his expectations too high, it's inherently freaks conglomerate a true loserville

So it's usually a few guys who're usually the same who get all the p(((ies and other guys (majority that's) pay to even meet live for a conversation.
Sounds f***ed up, but life is f(((ed up, welcome to planet earth.
Soundbanks for Sylenth1, Massive, lush-101, Zebra2, Diva, Monark, DCAM Here and Here
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