forums and public chats make me nervous

[Hink]

I haven't used a forum much before and I usually avoid, however I think a community to help me better myself in learning would be beneficial at the moment.

a thread like this should never be, I apologize to you Severa and ftr I am a mod here, feel free to call me John. This site should be known for the community and not the toxic side and it is on me that that reputation isnt intact...but there have been changes as we are committed to keeping this place as nontoxic as possible.

Recently several members have used common gaslighting accusing me of being too sensitive when people talk to me in a way I dont like. What they fail to see is it isnt about me, it is about threads like this. The truth is they shouldnt be talking to anyone they way they talk to me, including me, not especially me as they try to make it appear.

Members should post in a way that is respectful of other users. Flaming or abusing users in any way will not be tolerated and will result in your post being edited / deleted, and you may be issued with a warning and / or a ban.

(there is the threshold for EVERYONE)

Again I am sorry that a forum makes you nervous, there is so much to learn and this site has so many great members it breaks my heart to see this. Please use the report button if you have any issues and welcome

[ramseysounds]

I haven't used a forum much before and I usually avoid, however I think a community to help me better myself in learning would be beneficial at the moment.

Welcome Sevara
Lots of good advice so far. Lots of people on here have very good knowledge and decades worth of accumulated experience. The vast majority of people are worth chatting with. We all sometimes get riled and post stuff that with hindsight we shouldn’t; happens to the best of us (guilty as charged)! I hope you learn what you set out to. Just be aware you will always get differing opinions. It’s called life
Have fun

[MatsuHiroshi]

I haven't used a forum much before and I usually avoid, however I think a community to help me better myself in learning would be beneficial at the moment.

a thread like this should never be, I apologize to you Severa and ftr I am a mod here, feel free to call me John. This site should be known for the community and not the toxic side and it is on me that that reputation isnt intact...but there have been changes as we are committed to keeping this place as nontoxic as possible.

Recently several members have used common gaslighting accusing me of being too sensitive when people talk to me in a way I dont like. What they fail to see is it isnt about me, it is about threads like this. The truth is they shouldnt be talking to anyone they way they talk to me, including me, not especially me as they try to make it appear.

Members should post in a way that is respectful of other users. Flaming or abusing users in any way will not be tolerated and will result in your post being edited / deleted, and you may be issued with a warning and / or a ban.

(there is the threshold for EVERYONE)

Again I am sorry that a forum makes you nervous, there is so much to learn and this site has so many great members it breaks my heart to see this. Please use the report button if you have any issues and welcome

Having mods with this attitude is something this place can be proud of. You're a hero on the internet

[M_Ray]

There is certainly some of that advice to be had around here!

Just keep in mind that the trance and EBM producers tend to have different "rules" than the pop/rock songwriters If you can navigate that and understand why they give conflicting advice you'll be well on your way to mix anything

Very good advice, i'll take that on board!

[Hink]

welcome, I fixed your quote

[THE INTRANCER]

I haven't used a forum much before and I usually avoid, however I think a community to help me better myself in learning would be beneficial at the moment.

Basically, forums are like high school or even being in working job... the best thing to do is ignore any assholes you find.

[Biome_Digital]

No need to be nervous here. Lots of helpful people.

[JamelaBanderson]

I haven't used a forum much before and I usually avoid, however I think a community to help me better myself in learning would be beneficial at the moment.

They make me nervous too. At least people aren't obsessed with following each other and liking comments, so it's better than a lot of platforms. Welcome!

[MadDogE134]

welcome... the best advice i can give is to read more than comment. you will easily spot those that speak just to be speaking as well as those that just wish to argue. you will also start to note the ones that truly wish to help and those are the ones you comment to. no matter what others may say... imo the ONLY stupid question is the question never asked. those that wish to help can easily understand what you are asking even if you ask it the wrong (ish) way lol and they will correct you if need be and will answer your questions to the best of their ability. other than that... buyer beware lol

cheers and good luck


jay

p.s. also learn to be a duck lol and let the negativity roll off your back. remember as it is said... misery loves company so don't be a party. take everything with a grain of salt and keep putting one foot in front of the other. you will eventually get where you are going.

[zerocrossing]

The biggest problem with any forum is people who speak about their preferences like they’re indelible facts. They are, but only in local terms to the person making them. I try to use language like, “I like” and “for me.” I hate when I read something like, “X sucks.” Even if that product isn’t for me, it doesn’t really mean that it doesn’t have merit. For instance, I think the Cherry Audio plugins are not great sounding, but only in terms of their quality of emulation. They’re definitely capable of making cool sounds, and they’re very light on your CPU and maybe most importantly, cheap.

I think what happens is that people are insecure with their choices, and more often then not, their posts are a pep talk to themselves. Just try to keep that in mind.

Also, you’ll find a lot of people dealing with past traumas by being bullies. These are often the hardest ones to ignore.

[vurt]

sadly, you're going to meet people you don't get on with, not just in forums, but in most places in life.
but you will probably meet more you do get on with than not.

some people are asses, some people have just had a bad day.

but as someone earlier said, you're in your own room. no one can actually hurt you and you can use the for function under the person's profile, to at least block their posts. (sadly doesn't work if someone else quotes them)

[vurt]

and welcome aboard.
it's as good here as you make it

[NAD]

The first rule of KVR is YOU DO NOT FEED THE TROLLS.
But seriously though, threads on here can sometimes devolve into petty bickering and it can be REALLY difficult to resist the urge to engage with some of our less emotionally mature friends when this happens. It's like my mom would tell my older sibling when we were small, "If you just ignore him he'll stop bugging you!" Of course I was so annoying that they rarely succeeded in following her advice....
But otherwise, many members are very kind and helpful and many are experienced and intelligent folks who are generous with their knowledge. It can be an incredibly satisfying experience to have interesting and deep conversions with total strangers from around the world. Also just lurking around and reading other people saying smart things to each other is pretty rad.

[Burrito Whisperer]

Welcome, and I am in the same boat. Posting on forums gives me anxiety. I spend forever over thinking and rewriting my replies.
I wanted to buy a plugin from someone over in the for sale section, but I saw you need a minimum of 4 posts or something before you can message members. I think I've finally hit that miminum, but it's been a few days and I can't even remember what the plugin was anymore. XD
I figured I'd try to keep going and get myself out of my comfort zone and interact more.