So whats the best piece of advice you've ever gotten?

[Hink]

"Never discuss politics, religion or sex with friends (or family)...it's an almost guarenteed way to ensure they quickly become NOT your friends."

but then they weren´t friends in the first place ..

putte

I dont know that I agree with that....someone could be a zealous christian while another person is not....friends do not have to agree or believe on everything and furthermore with friendships comes wisdom...

I think Putte's point was that even if you don't believe the same thing, true friends can still discuss their beliefs. My wife and I are best friends. She devoutly believes in Tibetan Buddhism, whereas I believe that all organized religions are just cultural interpretations of the psychological experiences we all share due to our common physiology. And yet we're able to discuss these ideas without endangering our friendship.

well I took it to mean that if you cant discuss everything you're not true friends...but that imo is not true...two hard headed people can be friends...I appluad what you say about your wife and your relationship...but that doesn't speak for everyone.

I have one friend who can be quite stubborn about some subjects...but he is a true friend. As his friend I know that those subjects lead to the same place. The truth is the benefits of his friendship far out weigh his opinions on a few subjects...and if I judged our friendship on the things that we dont agree on I would be the loser in the end...I still vlue his friendship. Yes it's true, when discussing some subjects he can get pretty hot and worked u...a truer test of that friendship is do we allow those negative moments to define our friendship...I think not.

Any friendship/relationship where the two never clash is not a healthy relationship. However after a while of disagreeing on something quite often we just say "we're not going there again are we", we realise that we're not going to agree.

An example, he is against gay marriage, he does put up a "macho" front from time to time. I totally disagree with his position, I think it's quite close minded. So my friend isn't perfect, but then neither am I. But in no way would I say "well if you're against gay marriage then we cant be friends". Do I think he's a homophobe...yes absolutely...but that's his problem.

During the years of my steady involvement with the tg community he was truly unhappy. A big part of that was the fact that we have been friends for 20 years and he was hurt that I didn't trust him. He also said that he didn't want to talk about it (or see it) and tbh I didn't think asking him why would help the situation. Yet he's still a good friend, and forcing my views on him is not anymore fair then him forcing his on me. Therefore I show respect for my friend and honor his request...

[Har]

But back on topic:

A friend of mine gave this advice after a particularly bad experience playing D&D: "Life's too short to put up with assholes."

If I had followed that advice back when I was in a band, there would have been a lot less bitterness at the end. But of course that's a universal piece of advice, not just music related. But it's really true. If someone's being a dick, best thing to do is cut your ties and walk away.

I agree; had I started living by this advice earlier I would've had a lot less overall grief in my life.

To add a slight paraphrase: "Life's too short to put up with asshole family members."

Sadly, this is one I only started realizing later in life: just because someone is a family member doesn't absolve them of being rude, annoying, arrogant, bigoted assholes to you and/or your actual loved ones....and my extended family is definitely filled with such people. Which is why I now have nothing more to do with most of them: if I wouldn't put up with such incredibly vile actions from a non-family-member, I'm not willing to put on a happy face and ignore it just because they're "blood".

I always feel kinda sad for people who wind up putting with such things as inviting truly hated family-member to their own weddings, going to family get-togethers with people they despise (I know people who have repeatedly done such things even with scum-of-the-earth relatives that have sexually molested them when they were little ), etc...but still voluntarily go along with it again and again with a shrug, a weak smile and "What can ya do? You can't choose who's in your family..."
Well, no...while it's true you can't choose who you're biologically related to, you certainly CAN choose who you will or won't interact with.

Happily my wife is of the same mindset, which is why we had a very happy wedding with only 18 people present...the friends and family that we truly loved and wanted there (this contrasting to my first wedding which had over 250 people, most of whom I didn't like or didn't even know...but it was the old out-of-control chain-reaction: "But...if you don't invite Uncle Charlie, then Little Charlie will be offended, and if you offend Little Charlie, then Uncle Joey will be upset and won't bring Joey Junior, and..." ).
It's also why we have a wonderfully happy time celebrating together what might be usually considered traditional "spend the whole day with family" holidays like Thanksgiving, but alone and enjoying each other's company without having to hear endless annoying questions from condescending asshole family members like "so, when are you two finally going to change your minds and have some kids like the rest of us, eh?"

[SoftJunkie]

"Sometimes you just need a nap"

[rbet]

the best advice ever given to me was "don't wipe your arse with poison ivy"

[coldmachine]

"just remember son, theres nothing as over-rated as bad sex, and nothing as under-rated a good shit"

[vtx]

lite the other end....

[Hink]

But back on topic:

A friend of mine gave this advice after a particularly bad experience playing D&D: "Life's too short to put up with assholes."

If I had followed that advice back when I was in a band, there would have been a lot less bitterness at the end. But of course that's a universal piece of advice, not just music related. But it's really true. If someone's being a dick, best thing to do is cut your ties and walk away.

Oh, and here's a line or two from a Robert Ashley poem (I may not remember this totally correct):

He had determined to become serious
Later he discovered this was a mistake
But too late, he had arrived

I take that as advice.

Oh, and then there's the ultimate, from Monty Python: "Always look on the bright side of life."

I couldn't agree with that more, but for me it was a discovery, not from advice...the truth is I have but a few musician friends...that's why I like what technology has come up with. I dont need anyone else to express myself artistically anymore....

[Klemperer]

one of my favorite, not particularly related to music:

"Liberty is not doing what one wants, but wanting what one does."

Alain (french philosopher)

Is that the one Simone Weil liked to read so much? Because I lost the name of him and the book too from which I got this information, but it rings a bell...edit: googled her and Alain, and it IS the man. Thanks! Wouldn't have found out soon I guess because I was too lazy to google for it.

[Bourgeois]

Everyone's a comedian

Advice: 'fake it 'til you make it'

[mauseoleum]

"nevermind the bollocks"

did I spell that right?

okay then.

[clueless]

I suppose this and this

[ResonantOrder]

My father told me:

Think before you open your mouth.

My mother told me:

Nobody can take away your mind. Learn as much as you can, even if you can't use it right now. The day may come when you will need it.

Einstein said:

Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction.

I have a fortune cookie message taped to the top of my monitor:

If you can shape it in your mind, you will find it in life.

[Germ777]

First one given by my granpa on the secrets of life;
There are two types of women. Those who fly and those who like sex. Have you ever seen a woman flying?

Second given by a friend a long time ago;
You don´t need more equipment. You need better ideas
Germ

[Meffy]

From a conversation my mate are having at the moment:

If you don't know, say "I don't know." Posturing and bluster cannot make you right. (They can convince others to be as wrong as you are, though.)

Also: "Evidence" is not the plural of "anecdote."

[Hovmod]

"Evidence" is not the plural of "anecdote."

That's not what I've been told!