But what if you want to take it further?
Express those things that are ineffable.
Where does one go? Where are the unexplored corners?
You are writing songs for people that have lost loved ones. Perhaps yourself.
Where are the boundaries? How do we break through them once we identify them?
I find once I have written a nice and good and clever lyric that says everything I want to say, I yearn for 'more'. This 'more', I am finding more and more, can only be achieved by repetition, cliché and over-sentimentality. To introduce a contradiction, a paradox, into the equation. I use them sparingly but knowingly.
I like to think, as a master does, knowing when he can break the rules, but maybe I am just kidding myself.
There can only be one test. An acid test. I'm going to put up the 'rough' of a song that is one of four of my first e.p. It is naked, it is bare, vulnerable and innocent, so please be gentle with it. Then rip it to pieces
...Here it is:
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I just can't repair myself
And it just feels wrong
And if tomorrow will still be there
I guess you can be sure
The kisses will be pure
Taste of candy pure
I am so old and beyond repair
But I am so young
And if tomorrow still they stare
I'll kiss the candy shore
kiss the candy shore
While I can be sure
I know you got this thing you feel deep for me
Makes the children stop and stare
And if tomorrow it still remains there
I guess we can be sure
Yes our love was pure
Love that will endure
We been together since we were so young
Before our kingdom come
And if that love of ours is so beyond repair
I guess we can be sure
We both gave it our all
As our tears start to fall
Everybody falls apart at some time
Even if it is just to die
All this confusion
I got inside my mind
When some people aren't so kind
Everybody sing along
Everybody sing this song
Everybody sing along
Everybody say what's wrong
Never thought that I would see this day
Strange the things you sometimes find
And I don't understand what's it to do with you
How I feel inside
I can see it there over the range
I can see it with my eyes
And if it's true the things that I feel inside
I'll grow these wings and start to fly
I can see over the hills and far away
Where no demons do reside
Never understood the angels anyway
Wonder do they ever cry?
What hurts them deep inside
Brings the tears from their eye
So take my hand and fall down by my knee
Lady please don't let me down
We can do anything that we feel like
The choice is ours in this life
What's the good of a life that's so deprived?
Sometimes you should just do what you like.
If it doesn't hurt anyone in any way.
Who would ever deny?
In my head there is a raging storm
Stone and ice and fire
I count the days until our love's death
Of this you can be sure
So kiss me while it's pure
Full of strange allure
I am weak and falling apart at the seams
No matter how hard I ever try
My love for you it just brings me to my knees
That's the truth
No lie
Everybody sing along
Everybody sing along
Everybody sing this song
Everybody say what's wrong
And I've got this thing
I feel it deep inside
I can feel it when I lie
I am overgrown with the force of life
It's enough to make you smile
And if I fall down so far
And to my knees
And a needle pricks my eye
And I can't do the things
That I would like
Dig the ground and let me lie
Please just shoot me where I lie
Of this you can be sure
So kiss me while it's pure
Full of strange allure
Everybody sing along
Everybody sing this song
Everybody sing along
Everybody say what's wrong
Everybody is falling apart at the seams
Watching their dreams curl up and die
The confusion can be seen in their eyes
As they live their lie
See many troubles coming up along the way
Please redeem me 'fore I die
A little something can sometimes save the day
But it's in such short supply
When everything seems to fall apart in your hand
And your friends all leave you high and dry
Go outside at night when the moon is full and clear and high
And the stars (are) shining (so bright) in the sky
So take me over and please take the reigns
You're everything I desire
A little hungry thing with big sad brown eyes
They set my heart on fire
Everybody sing along
Everybody sing along
Everybody sing this song
Everybody say what's wrong
So move over and let me take the reigns
You're looking sad
To the table a feast is what you bring
(And) You get nothing back
So I would rather be the one to take the pain
The devils I shall fight
No one else gives the harvest that you give
It fills my life with light
I don't think many people ever really love that way
Let it go inside
Go outside and then dance in the pouring rain
Celebrate their desire
So move over and let me take the reigns
You're looking (so) tired
To the table a feast is what you bring
Yet you're so resigned
So I would rather be the one to take the pain
The demons I will fight
Like no one else the harvest that you give
Feeds my soul with light
Then I stand up and hold my head in my hands
My gaze looks to the floor
So many regrets in my wasted life
Now you're the one that I live for
I raise my head and get up from my bed
I see you standing by the door
Your perfect face just makes me stare
Your beauty I adore
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Pretty long, I know. It's presented in all its glory.
It's also very hard to get an idea of how the words sound without the melody and harmony behind them, but I expect you fellow songwriters to use your imagination.
I'll put a link up eventually when I finish it. Hopefully by the end of the year. That is the plan.
If it was too long and you couldn't read, that is ok. Then this question was not for you. I doubt it would be for anyone. But a fisherman throws out his net..
I am particularly fond of these lines:
----------------
So take me over and please take the reigns
You're everything I desire
A little hungry thing with big sad brown eyes
They set my heart on fire
-----------------
Wtf?
Am I turning into Bruce Springsteen?
Heart?
Fire?
Give it a rest!
Jeebus wept.
Yet, it says everything I am trying to say.
Through cliché and over-sentimentality.
What extremes do you go to, to make your point?
Do you ever sink as low as I have to hit 'em where it hurts?
Actually, I see the sheer stupidity in asking such a question without the music.
Doh..
I am such a f***ing numbnuts sometimes.
I tell you what, I'll still post it. And you can rip it into little pieces.
It deserves it. The question, that is. The words will take whatever you can throw.
And maybe that was my question in the first place.
Don't be kind now...
