KVR Audio

al2k1 · Post by **al2k1** » Mon Mar 09, 2015 9:42 pm

What do you call five oboists playing in unison?
Bagpipes

PatchAdamz · Post by **PatchAdamz** » Mon Mar 09, 2015 10:50 pm

"Wagner's music is better than it sounds."

-- Mark Twain

Hink · Post by **Hink** » Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:15 pm

how do you get a drummer out of your pool?

throw in a bar of soap

trimph1 · Post by **trimph1** » Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:48 pm

trimph1 wrote:About Bach....

He fathered 20 children in all. No wonder he was Baroque

He did not have enough organ stops

Hink · Post by **Hink** » Wed Mar 11, 2015 2:18 am

saw this on fb

someone called simon · Wed Mar 11, 2015 2:37 am

I hate drummer jokes. Being a guitarist/keyboard player i'm in awe of good, musical drummers… so important and so skillful and a joy to play with.

Hink · Post by **Hink** » Wed Mar 11, 2015 2:52 am

someone called simon wrote:I hate drummer jokes. Being a guitarist/keyboard player i'm in awe of good, musical drummers… so important and so skillful and a joy to play with.

so you have played with the one drummer who actually stops playing while the guitarist tunes?

Seriously, I have nothing against drummers but I do have issues with drum kits...ime it seems everywhere there is a drum kit sooner or later (more often sooner) someone comes along who has always wanted to try playing the drums

Aleatoriac · Post by **Aleatoriac** » Wed Mar 11, 2015 3:24 am

Music has value

Vospi · Post by **Vospi** » Wed Mar 11, 2015 10:01 am

nineofkings wrote:
cryophonik wrote:
Nightpolymath wrote:
Unfocused wrote:Most musician jokes fall a little flat for me...

-u

Yeah pretty deflating. Like going into a bar and being told they don't serve minors.
That's still no reason to diminish this thread.
You guys have major issues.

I think you're blowing it out of proportion, can I get you some scales?

someone called simon · Wed Mar 11, 2015 11:55 pm

Hink wrote:
someone called simon wrote:I hate drummer jokes. Being a guitarist/keyboard player i'm in awe of good, musical drummers… so important and so skillful and a joy to play with.
so you have played with the one drummer who actually stops playing while the guitarist tunes?

Seriously, I have nothing against drummers but I do have issues with drum kits...ime it seems everywhere there is a drum kit sooner or later (more often sooner) someone comes along who has always wanted to try playing the drums

Yes! but then, these days I very rarely play with a drummer. I play in a western swing/jazz whatever retro band where slapped double bass and chugging guitar do rhythm duties usually. And to be honest, the singer often has to tell me to stop the guitar noodling, while tuning her violin or setting up mics. I think guitarists share that failing with drummers...

bluedad · Post by **bluedad** » Wed Mar 11, 2015 11:59 pm

A pianist and singer are rehearsing "Autumn Leaves" for a concert and the pianist says:
"OK. We will start in G minor and then on the third bar, modulate to B major and go into 5/4.
When you get to the bridge, modulate back down to F# minor and alternate a 4/4 bar with a 7/4 bar.
On the last A section go into double time and slowly modulate back to G minor."
The singer says: "Wow, I don't think I can remember all of that."
The pianist says: "Well, that's what you did last time."

Tricky-Loops · Post by **Tricky-Loops** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:10 am

One musician says to another one: "We finally produced an album!" - "Great! And how many did you sell?" - "I sold my house, and the drummer sold his car!"

Tricky-Loops · Post by **Tricky-Loops** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:15 am

The door bell rings. "Hello, I'm your piano tuner!" - "But I didn't hire you at all!" - "No, you didn't hire me but your neighbor did!"

Touch The Universe · Post by **Touch The Universe** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:49 am

you can tune a piano, but you can't tune-a-fish

bluedad · Post by **bluedad** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:07 am

Tjgoa wrote:you can tune a piano, but you can't tune-a-fish

if I had a nickel for every time I heard that I'd be rich...and everyone that says that to me thinks that's the most clever and original thing to say..(I am a piano tuner, btw)

Your Favorite Musician Joke ?