My girlfriend hates my music making

[Zexila]

My condolences to you and that poor bunny.

[nineofkings]

socially inept geeks arguing and projecting their own emotional baggage

Coincidentally the title of my band's upcoming album

[harryupbabble]

my band

Is that a rare phrase here or what?

[IncarnateX]

It's getting worse and worse Really hope the male chauvinist are joking.

I think everyone would say the same thing if it was a bloke who was neglecting his girlfriend.

??? I am talking about the advice to ditch her because she is a "narcissist" in particular and likewise advices in general. What has that to do her neglecting him? (If that is even the case?)

[Roman Empire]

My girlfriend hates how this 'My girlfriend hates my music making' thread is still being updated with the nonsense witterings of socially inept geeks arguing and projecting their own emotional baggage for the mistaken benefit of an OP who left this thread a few days ago.
(She's also rather displeased at my own two 'contributions' to this thread).

My girlfriend thinks that the OP's problems have been resolved one way or another by now, if he's been man enough to deal with them by having 'the conversation' with his missus.
She was rather amused at his belief that random computer music nerds would somehow be able to fix this for him.

FWIW, she hates my love-making and prefers spending time with her rabbit (though strangely I've never seen her feeding it with any lettuce).

Be wiser in the future and don´t share KVR with your gf

The "being man enough" approach only works in a perfect world where everybody´s got fantastic communication- and listening skills. Many people, wether it being men or women, don´t work well with "a good serious down to earth discussion where all problems get resolved".

Does your gf also think that there´s no sense in that females with a similar hobby discuss their relationship problems, or is it just male audio-geeks who somehow are low on skills regarding the discussion of eachothers relationships? That´d be pretty sexistic then!

All that being said, the one advise I don´t agree with is to dump her. If there´s a will, there´s a way. I´m sure the OP knows his partner well enough to see which approaches that could be worth it in this case, and which ones that are not applicable at all. If all fails and he needs to drug her and put her in a box so they can seek therapy - it´s worth it! (for all sexist remark seekers: That about the box is a joke, and I´d have said it about a woman having similar issues with her bf).

Btw, what DOES she feed that rabbit with then...??

Best Regards

Roman Empire

[Jace-BeOS]

The "being man enough" approach only works in a perfect world where everybody´s got fantastic communication- and listening skills. Many people, wether it being men or women, don´t work well with "a good serious down to earth discussion where all problems get resolved".

Well, most people are, sadly, not very rational. But i think everyone should give it a try and give their partners the benefit of the doubt, rather than just preclude the potential. It REALLY helps to know how to talk to someone without being accusatory or otherwise hostile, making them defensive, etc. Or, rather, it CAN really help. Some people are so insecure and irrational that you could smile at them lovingly and get punched in the throat because of what they think you might be thinking.

Does your gf also think that there´s no sense in that females with a similar hobby discuss their relationship problems, or is it just male audio-geeks who somehow are low on skills regarding the discussion of eachothers relationships? That´d be pretty sexistic then!

You're not asking me, but i'm going to opine nonetheless : i don't visit a lot of women-only forums, but i do visit a lot of forums with a lot of women. It seems to me that groups of interest-focused women tend to be a bit more socially functional than groups of technical men... But then there's a similar problem with technical women.

It's really the "technical people" part that seems to be the correlation. There are fewer women obsessing over technology, but certainly plenty that get deeply technical about other topics (horse breeds, grammar, literature, medicine, chemistry, whatever). People who really get into very technical realms seem to have difficulty with soft-skills because there's no absolute set of hard physical rules governing them. They embrace technical things because they have clear cut, hard absolutes.

Men are more visible in this regard, possibly because women are pushed away from technical things and therefore may possibly develop better social skills (by way of not being allowed to get lost pursuing technical things as much as men). Men are pretty much encouraged to get deep in these things, because "they're man things", they can be highly marketable skills... and it's easier to "let boys be boys" - ie: it frees parents/schools from having to work harder at teaching social skills and grey areas to boys having difficulty with those things...

[Aloysius]

There are fewer women obsessing over technology ...

Like hair dryers and washing machines?

[Numanoid]

But then there's a similar problem with technical women

[Numanoid]

There are fewer women obsessing over technology ...

Like hair dryers and washing machines?

Glad I am not in such a relationship, somebody craving space, and actually think it is funny

[Jace-BeOS]

But then there's a similar problem with technical women

What?

[Aloysius]

There are fewer women obsessing over technology ...

Like hair dryers and washing machines?

Glad I am not in such a relationship, somebody craving space, and actually think it is funny

[Numanoid]

What?

I ask the same about this kind of quote, what are you on about, your attempts at political correctness escapes me ?:

i don't visit a lot of women-only forums, but i do visit a lot of forums with a lot of women. It seems to me that groups of interest-focused women tend to be a bit more socially functional than groups of technical men... But then there's a similar problem with technical women.

[Karma_tba]

What is worse? The fact that the OP is "airing his dirty laundry" on an obviously inappropriate place(KVR), or that people are replying either seriously or tongue in cheek. Issues like this should only be discussed with the other person involved. There is much more to the situation than his "hobby". I only hope that his mate is not aware of or have access to his KVR profile. Anyone would resent their personal life being a topic for discussion on some dubious web forum.

[Numanoid]

[Numanoid]

Issues like this should only be discussed with the other person involved.

That means, if my logic doesn't escape me, that you would be the other person involved?

Why else would you post in this thread if you are not directly involved