What are the 10 best ways to get a spider out of a midi Keyboard ?

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thecontrolcentre wrote: Wed Nov 18, 2020 4:46 pm I bought a new midi keyboard a few years ago. It arrived with a huge moth inside one of the VU meters. I sent it back ...
VU meters on a midi keyboard? :eek:

What model is that?

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Invite him out to lunch or something.
I mean, make it clear that its just a platonic kind of thing, you dont want to lead him on, but let him know that youd like to spend some time with him, and maybe after a while youll come to see he isnt so bad, and maybe you can be roommates.
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Shame you don't know what sex the spider was. Sending a female in there, to pair and eat the male afterwards would have been an idea. Although you have the issue of the other spider in there then...

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I know a novation that swallowed a bird
How absurd to swallow a bird
It swallowed the bird to catch the spider.......

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Maybe if you open a really cool looking spider night club across the street it will eventually get curious and go over for happy hour or something. Then you just dont let him back in until he sobers up and starts contributing around the house.
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chk071 wrote: Thu Dec 03, 2020 9:58 pm Shame you don't know what sex the spider was. Sending a female in there, to pair and eat the male afterwards would have been an idea. Although you have the issue of the other spider in there then...
Tie a string around the female so you can pull it back out.
A well-behaved signature.

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Maybe everytime you sit down to play some tunes, you loudly mention how there are just so many darn flies in another part of the house.
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Finagle your tongue between the keys, penetrating all the way past the base of the keys. This will pinch a bit, but trust me, you'll be fine (EDIT: see disclaimer below). Most people don't know this, but human saliva is a natural spider aphrodisiac (that's why people accidentally eat so many spiders while they are sleeping). Instead of biting your tongue, the spider will try to make love to it (male or female, makes only a tiny bit of difference). Now, it may feel a little nasty at first, but if you get past your initial revulsion, it can be quite pleasurable. Don't ask me how I know.

Then, the trick is to slowly slide your tongue along the maze of the crevices between the keys, luring the spider along the way. Don't move too quickly (can also cut tongue off this way, I'm told). Try to move your tongue seductively in a sort of ritual mating dance--do your best with this--imagine what a spider might like. After getting the spider out, consider keeping it around and bonding with it. Far from what the young people think these days, ritual mating dances aren't the end all/be all of relationships. Try holding hands, gazing into each other's myriad eyes, watching a movie together (NOTE: not Charlotte's Web--SPOILER, the lead spider character dies in the film--yes, that can be upsetting emotionally, but what really pisses spiders off about Hollywood is that the spider always gets killed off first). Good luck, and I wish you well.

EDIT: DISCLAIMER: It has come to my attention that the above technique is indeed quite dangerous and not worth the risk (balanced against true love, this is debatable). Even at slow speeds, one can sever one's tongue by sticking it in a keyboard. And no, for the last time, I did not come about this knowledge by intentionally visiting any bawdy adult sites; I accidentally went to one looking for innocent dancing hamster gifs (true story), and heaven's to Betsy the things I saw, smh.
Last edited by Dirtgrain on Wed Dec 09, 2020 12:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Doing nothing is only fun when you have something you are supposed to do.

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jackoo wrote: Wed Nov 18, 2020 6:52 pm well, at least there it can't bite
JFYI.. spiders don't bite, they slash.

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jp008 wrote: Mon Dec 07, 2020 6:31 am
jackoo wrote: Wed Nov 18, 2020 6:52 pm well, at least there it can't bite
JFYI.. spiders don't bite, they slash.
Apologies. I stand corrected.

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Are we to refer to "spider bites" as "spider slashes" from now on?
Doing nothing is only fun when you have something you are supposed to do.

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Dirtgrain wrote: Mon Dec 07, 2020 9:01 pm Are we to refer to "spider bites" as "spider slashes" from now on?
All I know is, it's a cover-up !

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chk071 wrote: Thu Dec 03, 2020 9:58 pm Shame you don't know what sex the spider was. Sending a female in there, to pair and eat the male afterwards would have been an idea. Although you have the issue of the other spider in there then...
Yes, she's pregnant then and will give birth to hundreds, nah! thousends of aggressive, hungry killer spiders right in your setup. Have fun to be eaten alive! :borg:

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Didn't think of that... :lol:

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Googling, I found using citric acid, garlic, or a doused Q-tip with Raid Spider killer along edges can get it out of hard to reach places. The best thing to do is to take it apart.
...and the electron responded, "what wall?"

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