The Wagtunes Corner (Featuring My Best Yet)

[MadDogE134]

Merry Christmas All... don't horde all the coal cheers and may God bless

[ProfessionalTom]

Thanks guys!

Yeah I certainly will spend a lot of time with family but for now after all this fish, mushroom soup and champagne I'll just chill staring at my christmas tree until I gently slip into a more dispersed, dreaming state of mind hehehe.

@MadDog Merry Christmas to you, too man!

[experimental.crow]

that's me, my mum and my granddaughter.
(im the one with the beard)(mum on opposite side of baby in middle)

ftfy ...

[Forgotten]

Finally! I thought for a moment that no one was going to fix it...

[vurt]

that's me, my mum and my granddaughter.
(im the one with the beard)(mum on opposite side of baby in middle)

ftfy ...

[JonSolo]

Well I know you got to have something new....

[wagtunes]

Well I know you got to have something new....

I am actually working on my latest song for 7 days now. See what you did Jon? You've created a monster. I'm hoping to finish it this weekend but I'm not putting a definite on that. The attention to detail that I'm paying to arrangement now is like nothing I've ever done before. It's both a blessing and a curse. My brain is working in ways that it's yet to work in all the years I've been doing this. It is definitely a strange feeling.

Anyway, I will try to have something by end of Sunday.

No guarantees.

But thanks for opening up a whole new world for me.

[wagtunes]

3rd track from my upcoming CD "2020"

8 days in the making. Longer than I've ever worked on any one song.

I don't even know where to begin with what I did with this thing. The arrangement was mapped out in explicit detail every second of the way. A lot didn't work before I finally found a road map that seemed to fit the pieces together. There is no question this is the most intricate pop song, from an arrangement standpoint anyway, that I've ever done, though I have done some experimental and prog stuff with as many variations along the way. But this is just different and it's hard to explain how.

I'm sure there will be many who won't agree with some of my arrangement choices. For that matter, I am sure that some, or all for all I know, will think the song is total crap. The vocals are ugly as sin. They were done intentionally that way due to the subject matter. That will become obvious as you read the lyrics.

In all honesty though, I don't have the musical skills to pull off a track like this. But I wanted to see how close I could come. It isn't horrible, but I know it can be a lot better. Not by me however. I don't have the "rock" voice that this track demands.

In the end, this was a shit ton of work. Anything that IS wrong with it was not from lack of effort. I put everything I had into this song. As to whether or not that's enough, that's for you to decide.

But, I will say this. Aside from my limitations as a performer and engineer, I'm pleased with how it turned out. My conscience is clear. I gave 100% to this thing.

I can't do more than that.

For anybody who wants to listen, here you go.

I Only Smile When It Hurts

We've been through a lot
We've seen both the good and the bad
We've cried lots of tears
We've laughed through adventures we've had

And yet through it all
We've managed to get through the pain
With our backs to the wall
We got through the pouring rain

But when you turn your back on me
I hope that you can clearly see

I only smile when it hurts
When you've taken all my joy away
I only smile when it hurts
When there's nothing left for me to say
You may have torn my world apart
Left it hanging on a cross to bear
I only smile when it hurts
And it hurts when you're not there

Not sure what went wrong
I thought we had a pretty solid thing
There were those good times
When you gladly wore my wedding ring

But then something changed
You lost that smile on your pretty face
And you tried to cover up
But you couldn't find a peaceful place

I guess the end it had to come
I know it's time for you to run

Repeat Chorus

Maybe someday when you find your place
I can wipe this smile off my face

I only smile when it hurts
I only smile when it hurts
I only smile when it hurts
I only smile when it hurts

Outro

https://soundcloud.com/steven-wagenheim ... n-it-hurts

[Distorted Horizon]

Add a hint of "end of the world" and dirt to everything and we have a new Marilyn Manson

[Distorted Horizon]

Production wise very good. Can't say anything about the mix since I can't listen loud now.. But well built song and stays interesting from the beginning to the end.

[wagtunes]

Add a hint of "end of the world" and dirt to everything and we have a new Marilyn Manson

Thanks, but I'm not sure I'd go that far.

Anyway, thanks for the listen and the feedback.

[donkey tugger]

3rd track from my upcoming CD "2020"

8 days in the making. Longer than I've ever worked on any one song.

I don't even know where to begin with what I did with this thing. The arrangement was mapped out in explicit detail every second of the way. A lot didn't work before I finally found a road map that seemed to fit the pieces together. There is no question this is the most intricate pop song, from an arrangement standpoint anyway, that I've ever done, though I have done some experimental and prog stuff with as many variations along the way. But this is just different and it's hard to explain how.

I'm sure there will be many who won't agree with some of my arrangement choices. For that matter, I am sure that some, or all for all I know, will think the song is total crap. The vocals are ugly as sin. They were done intentionally that way due to the subject matter. That will become obvious as you read the lyrics.

In all honesty though, I don't have the musical skills to pull off a track like this. But I wanted to see how close I could come. It isn't horrible, but I know it can be a lot better. Not by me however. I don't have the "rock" voice that this track demands.

In the end, this was a shit ton of work. Anything that IS wrong with it was not from lack of effort. I put everything I had into this song. As to whether or not that's enough, that's for you to decide.

But, I will say this. Aside from my limitations as a performer and engineer, I'm pleased with how it turned out. My conscience is clear. I gave 100% to this thing.

I can't do more than that.

For anybody who wants to listen, here you go.

I Only Smile When It Hurts

We've been through a lot
We've seen both the good and the bad
We've cried lots of tears
We've laughed through adventures we've had

And yet through it all
We've managed to get through the pain
With our backs to the wall
We got through the pouring rain

But when you turn your back on me
I hope that you can clearly see

I only smile when it hurts
When you've taken all my joy away
I only smile when it hurts
When there's nothing left for me to say
You may have torn my world apart
Left it hanging on a cross to bear
I only smile when it hurts
And it hurts when you're not there

Not sure what went wrong
I thought we had a pretty solid thing
There were those good times
When you gladly wore my wedding ring

But then something changed
You lost that smile on your pretty face
And you tried to cover up
But you couldn't find a peaceful place

I guess the end it had to come
I know it's time for you to run

Repeat Chorus

Maybe someday when you find your place
I can wipe this smile off my face

I only smile when it hurts
I only smile when it hurts
I only smile when it hurts
I only smile when it hurts

Outro

https://soundcloud.com/steven-wagenheim ... n-it-hurts

Hehe, I will probably be humming this all morning now..

Interesting arrangement - I always like something a bit different. Think you've slightly missed a trick by not having the 16th synth part at the end again, locked in with the hi-hats playing 16ths too to really up the energy (and cob a tambourine in there for good measure too - the old ones always work.. )

Vocals wise the sound is definitely improved. I know you struggle with the singing, and on this occasion it's not far off, but for future reference I think you could probably dial the effort down a bit in the verses for this type of thing - no need to hold the notes as long, keep it more low key and staccato so there's more contrast with the chorus.

[wagtunes]

Thanks DT. Suggestions noted. Never thought of staccato for the verses. Ah but you see, that's what happens when you're not a singer, Yes, the contrast would have been much better, absolutely.

[JonSolo]

Since several have asked me what we have talked about, I thought I would continue this publicly so if anyone desired, they might benefit a little.

Extraordinary effort!

On the overall song: again you have these great ideas. You are truly prolific. What I found in this one track alone is you do have the ability to channel many styles. In an effort to bring variety to this track, you also added styles. This gave it a progressive feel for sure. Maybe even a show/theater style feel. More on this in a bit...

Guitar solos: Huge leap forward. Great job!

Drum and bass variety: Well executed ideas...maybe too many different ideas. More on this in a bit...

Arrangement: donkey tugger makes an incredibly valid issue. The opening arpeggios are great and would have been the glue to the whole piece. Honestly I did like the second more subtle arpeggio sound (around 1:36). Allowing a filter to open and close that sound throughout the piece, along with the suggested HH's and tamb (or shakers) would have really stapled down the final production.

But I am going to add one more real tip to your arsenal...and this can happen when you spend a lot of time on a track looking for ways to modulate (for the uninitiated, simplified- this is a composition term that denotes a tonal/center change, but not necessarily a key change, adds interest to the piece): your song is constantly searching for its identity. In the end it can make a song REALLY interesting, but at the same time, it can feel unsatisfying.

Here is what I mean-

0:00 Awesome start, feels a little like Trent Reznor, I know where this could go,
0:35 Ok it went different than I thought, a lean towards a Beatles feel, wow, blend those two together? Cool...
0:48 Oh, wait...I see more of a Jim Steinman thing. Hmm I sorta, uh, kinda, guess it could work...
1:15 Hmmm, did we just go Spinal Tap? Where is this song going?
1:36 Well here comes Vince DiCola....

That is just in the first minute and a half. I know you worked a long time on it. But for us, only a minute and half passed. And we had 5 different styles flash before us. So instead of just modulating, or even shifting gears (we talked cars in private messages) it is like we kept getting into whole new vehicles. I think you know what I mean by that. I have been guilty, especially in my orchestral music of this MANY times! When we work on a piece and we play the same 20-30 seconds over and over again to perfect a section (because the longer we spend on a song, the more we work in blocks), our brains trick us into thinking that it is a much longer section than it is. In the end, we worry that we will bore our audience, when in reality it is us who is getting bored with that section. So for the next refrain, we do a huge dynamic change...one that works if the piece had been going for several minutes. However, when it has only been a short time (under 30 seconds) it jars the listener and confuses what they are listening for. This idea can work if it happens one or two times and then somehow is brought together in the end and resolved. But too many changes (5 in a minute and a half) can leave our tracks feeling disjointed. Oh they are interesting, full of talent and skill, and incredibly full sounding, but disjointed and confusing...thus unsatisfied.

This was an extraordinary effort. It was a huge track. It certainly was interesting and showed your ability to deliver a variety of styles in a single, well thought out composition. But the constant change of style overwhelmed the track, not that it was bad, just overpowering. Adding the 16ths could have glued it together better, but it still would be a lot of pieces.

Earlier I mentioned show/theater style track...this kind of track might work if it is piecing together ideas from other songs that work as a complete body. Even then, there tends to be a distinctive style or blend of styles, versus what feels like a dramatic change of direction.

But keep moving forward. Every step is incredible. And clearly you are on your way!

[wagtunes]

@thejonsolo

Excellent feedback as always. Yeah, I probably went overboard with the arrangement variations. It's called overcompensating for my static arrangements up until now. Eventually, I will find a happy medium. That won't happen overnight either.

As for the things I could have done, the ARP at the beginning is actually elsewhere in the piece but it's probably not prevalent enough because of all the other stuff going on, on top of it. So it got a little lost in the soup.

This was really like me writing my first song. It was a completely different mindset and a process that I'm simply not used to or comfortable with yet. So it's going to take me a while to get this stuff to not sound like I'm jumping from a Corvette to a Porsche to a Moped.

Will be starting on my next song shortly.

We'll see where that one takes us.

Should be interesting.