Changing the scales of life

[Doug1978]

Whilst drifting away to the Orb's delightful new album Cow / Chill Out World! this afternoon, I was suddenly hit by a revelation...

https://soundcloud.com/kompakt/sets/the ... ut-world-1



Scales of life.
And how can we change them?

For too long, I've been a man who did everything stop-start.
I've enjoyed many wonderful, exciting, colorful bursts of life interspersed with periods of lethargic, flat recuperation.

And it occurred to me that some people I know don't crash, boom-bust-boom-bust, along this mortal coil.
They take everything at a steadier, more regular pace.
Perhaps they are happier and calmer, more at peace with themselves.
Perhaps they are more mature: their family life brings a certain satisfying fulfillment which my broodlessness forbids?

Then I got thinking. What if I expanded my bursts of wild joy beyond their usual short moments.
What if I increased my scale of time?
So maybe a man can live his entire earthly journey in full-on celebration and wide-eyed excitement of being, and trade this in for a 'downer' which lasts the whole of his next existence?

And would he want to do that?
(Hell yeah!)


Then the Orb's music stopped, I awoke and wrote this post.

[.jon]

[harryupbabble]

Not me, I don't need a life-change. I'm just a simple guy. All I need is scrabble and music-making. And food and shelter. And health. And time.

I could probably do without the internet. But I would rather not. Scrabble and music-making is doable without it but it's better with it. And cheaper.

I wish I would win the lotto, insane belief as it may be (that it's possible). And if I win the lotto, I still would not change my life. Scrabble and music. And sometimes rubbery, plasticy, rubbish, that's-not-cheese, cheese. Hahaha. That's enough for me. It's plenty to keep me busy and happy. Life could be a lot, lot, lot worse.

[foosnark]

For too long, I've been a man who did everything stop-start.
I've enjoyed many wonderful, exciting, colorful bursts of life interspersed with periods of lethargic, flat recuperation.

And it occurred to me that some people I know don't crash, boom-bust-boom-bust, along this mortal coil.
They take everything at a steadier, more regular pace.
Perhaps they are happier and calmer, more at peace with themselves.
Perhaps they are more mature: their family life brings a certain satisfying fulfillment which my broodlessness forbids?

Well. Before 2016, I would have creative bursts that kind of felt like hard work and lots of pressure, in between months of not really doing anything creative. I'm not sure one phase was any happier or less happy than the other.

In 2016 I planned to finish one track per week just to keep it steady and consistent. And I did that, except for a remix project that was also awesome to be a part of. It all got much more intense than that at the end... but it never really felt like a burden once I got in the habit. Was I happier and calmer? With that aspect of my life, yes. Pretty damned proud actually.

But overall? Politics got under my skin. The world feels more dangerous and hostile and full of assholes than it did last year. Every family member had at least one serious medical issue, and some of them were life-threatening. I'm still just as easily frustrated by little things that I shouldn't take personally. I still find self-discipline in any other area of my life difficult. I still often feel like I don't fully connect with anyone or anything outside myself.

I kind of want to ignore the outside world and look inward for a while; to just focus on that and my music. Some of the spiritual stuff I've been into in the past says inward is outward anyway but I'm about ready to say "f**k it."

Hmm, auto censoring. f**k that, too