KVR Audio

the_nihilist · Post by **the_nihilist** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 5:57 pm

Looking for a bit of humor here, so what is the dumbest thing you've ever heard anyone say about making music, listening to music, or just relating to music in general?

I'll start with "Only talentless musicians use music theory!" said by a so called "experimental" musician I once ran into.

cyanogen · Post by **cyanogen** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:00 pm

I think it was something like, "He's so talentless that he should quit writing music!" What did he expect me to say? "Hey, you know what? You're right! I'll stop right now!"

The guy who insulted me thought he was a musician because he made "mix" CDs consisting of nothing but A-ha songs.

funkadil · Post by **funkadil** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:04 pm

One of my friends is the complete opposite. He is hugely into noise and experimental type of music but for some reason he wants to take music theory classes. He wants to know about song writing and traditional song structures even though he never creates any music that would rely on it anyways.

Atonal · Post by **Atonal** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:11 pm

'Repeats are for musicians who show up late to the gig'
or
'How many notes are required for a rock musician to solo ?'
..... at least 30 ... 'one for the first bar, one for the second bar, one for the third bar ......'

--atonal

The Chase · Post by **The Chase** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:11 pm

the_nihilist wrote:Looking for a bit of humor here, so what is the dumbest thing you've ever heard anyone say about making music, listening to music, or just relating to music in general?

BONES wrote:I can almost guarantee that I will not like anything with any kind of black influence.
[...]
the black influence ruins it every time.

i still respect bones as a producer and synth designer, but that right there simply astonished me.

soulkraka · Post by **soulkraka** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:15 pm

A. whats that keyboard part?

B. its a wurli and an organ layered.

A. you cant have two different instruments playing the same thing!!

sad

topaz · Post by **topaz** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:16 pm

it dont mean a thing it it aint got that quantized to 16th notes globally thang.

tekno tekno disko babe

Chase wrote:
BONES wrote:I can almost guarantee that I will not like anything with any kind of black influence.
[...]
the black influence ruins it every time.
i still respect bones as a producer and synth designer, but that right there simply astonished me.

the_nihilist · Post by **the_nihilist** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:16 pm

funkadil wrote:One of my friends is the complete opposite. He is hugely into noise and experimental type of music but for some reason he wants to take music theory classes. He wants to know about song writing and traditional song structures even though he never creates any music that would rely on it anyways.

I have a theory. All so-called "experimental" musicians that have no background in music before they start secretly harbor a forbidden wish to create cheesy melodic trance music, but since they can't make it, they hide behind the lie of experimentalism to make themselves more talented than they really are. And then they reject music theory because they "don't want to get stuck sounding like everyone else"

Your friend has got the right idea, though. Learning more about music can only make you better off as an artist.

Sepheritoh · Post by **Sepheritoh** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:32 pm

Then there is the very overused quote "There is only two kinds of music, good music and bad music" attributed to somebody else each time I see that quote. Each time I see it, which seems at least once each week at a different place, I just want to scream. Or at least puke a little bit and then scream.

waiting man · Post by **waiting man** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:39 pm

A bass teacher once told me that scales MUST go from one note to the octave. the same guy told me he used to play over king crimson trying to correct their "wrong" notes.

then he gave me "master of puppets" and "spain" to learn. I left the school. (and after ten years I still remember Spain)

crimsontider · Post by **crimsontider** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:44 pm

I hear a lot of strange race related remarks like:

"Bee Gees are not disco."

"White people can't feel music."

and uhm...
"We gave them some good instruments, they gave us some good beats in return."

I see many, in a desperate attempt to own a genre, broadening music to something beyond the sound. Some people are Broadening their definition of a music genre to include race and or cultural backgound of the musician in order to exclude them from that genre.

My views are that an African American from the bowels of North Africa could compose better classical music than a Mozart great great great grandson or that a white from Sweden COULD write a better rap song than Dr Dre. It has nothing to do with anything other than the finished product and that it should be listened to without prejudice of the musician’s racial or cultural upbringing.

I am finished with my taboo comments. I had seen a lot of comments the past couple of weeks related to my comments here and wanted to express them. This thread title was an opportunity to do so.

Kraku · Post by **Kraku** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:48 pm

One stupid line pops into my mind and it was said by me many years ago. I was listening to music in a loud volume (even though at that point I didn't realize it) and my sister started to protest. I explained to her: "It's not playing on high volume. It just sounds loud...". Needless to say, the volume went down right after that...

Sepheritoh · Post by **Sepheritoh** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:50 pm

crimsontider wrote:I hear a lot of strange race related remarks like:

"Bee Gees are not disco."
.

I am totaly confused now. What is racist about that statement. I mean, it is stupid, but I fail to see racism in it.

Since when does Bee Gees have anything to do with race or how does disco come into it?

Nah, I am just confused.

Must be. Let me go think a bit harder.

crimsontider · Post by **crimsontider** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 6:56 pm

Sepheritoh wrote:
crimsontider wrote:I hear a lot of strange race related remarks like:

"Bee Gees are not disco."
.
I am totaly confused now. What is racist about that statement. I mean, it is stupid, but I fail to see racism in it.

Since when does Bee Gees have anything to do with race or how does disco come into it?

Nah, I am just confused.

Must be. Let me go think a bit harder.

It was a complete thread not just a sentence. My mistake for not making that clear but you're acting a little spasical for not considering that there might be more to it.

Sepheritoh · Post by **Sepheritoh** » Mon Aug 01, 2005 7:00 pm

crimsontider wrote: but you're acting a little spasical for not considering that there might be more to it.

I don't even know what "spasical" means, but it does not matter. I know the thread you refer to, but still don't think it was a racist thing about the Bee Gees.

What's the stupidest thing you've heard said about music?